Say goodbye to PTSD and hello to possibilities

Now that I’ve completed the second weekend of EMDR training and have received my certificate of completion for EMDR, I’m practicing it on a regular basis with my clients and seeing some remarkable results. Some clients with Posttraumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) report that they now find no pain in thinking about what used to be their most painful memories. The sting is gone from their trauma experiences and they are moving on to deal with all of the secondary problems, which compared to the previous problems, are much easier to work on. Most report being free from hyper-vigilance, scanning, disturbing dreams, intrusive memories, compulsion, racing thoughts, and other psychological disturbances. They are now starting to rethink their life goals and are moving toward fulfilling their dreams.

For me, this is the best part of my life. I get to help wounded people recover and move to a greater sense of purpose and destiny, freed from the disturbances that held them captive for so many years. I hoping that this joy continues as I pursue my passion of helping others to find healing and blessing.

EMDR - Wonderful Stuff

I've just completed the first weekend of training in EMDR - Eye-Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing. Wow! EMDR is really awesome. As part of the training, I processed two current stressors in two separate sessions. After the weekend, I felt the least anxiety than I’ve felt in years. I was extremely peaceful and calm and it seemed nothing could disturb my calm. If you haven’t tried EMDR and you struggle with anxiety or phobia, I highly recommend seeking a counselor who is trained in it. If you’d like to work with me, go to my website at http://www.tedmathis.net/ and give me a call. I’d love to work with you.

I don't think I could do this

Alone in the woods with his left leg pinned beneath a fallen tree for 11 hours, a 66-year-old man used pocket knives to cut off his limb below the knee to free himself.

Al Hill had been cutting trees last Friday when one fell on him. After freeing himself, he cried out for help, and a neighbor passing through this sparsely populated area heard him.

Eric Bookey then hiked nearly two miles to get a cellular signal and placed an emergency call to the Iowa Hill, CA all-volunteer fire department.

Hill was eventually airlifted by helicopter to a hospital where he underwent amputation surgery.

The Money Thing

I had a pretty good talk last night with my Dad about what he believes about money.

His money "shadow" includes things like:

• I have to get excellent value for money spent on myself
• I have to pay cash for everything (no loans without full collateral)
• I must wait and save for everything I want before I buy it
• I must always be conservative, especially with money
• I must not take risks with money
• I must regret greatly any money I waste, lose, squander, or spend foolishly
• I therefore must repress and deny all failures with regard to money
• Money is not a relational issue that impacts others personally, it's a financial matter
• If one of my kids screws up with money, both of my kids must equally suffer the consequences
• It's OK for me to have enough money while others I care about lack money
• Never let others know how much money you actually have
• In some cases, I can secretly and arbitrarily give money to those I care about

Of course I don't agree with all of this, but at least now I have a better idea of my roots in this area.

What's your money shadow? How are your rules different?

A Sad Ending

I just got back from a very sad funeral. But it wasn’t because so many people were crying. This guy was 59, retired from Qwest 2 years ago, an introvert and an avid bicyclist. He helped me out a bunch back when I did the Lung 150. Now, today, only about 60 people attended his funeral, and only a few folks that came were from Qwest.

He moved out here in 94 when I did, so he's had 12 years to make friends here, but a lot of us made the move with him from Minneapolis, so potentially he would have had a lot more former co-workers there. It’s not like folks didn’t have some warning. He found out that he had cancer almost two years ago.

There were no hymns. No vocal solos. An Episcopal deacon did the service. She said some generic things about how God loves all of us, but there was no mention of his faith, or anything good he did, other than allusions to the biking/racing, and that his last words to their only daughter were: "I love you." His wife, Sylvia, had written a last letter to her husband, and the deacon read it.

Listening to the crowd, I overheard a number of folks say, “I’m a friend of Sylvia’s.” Wow. I sure hope that if I die before I’m 60, things are much different.

Finances, contentment, and dependency

Greg made some interesting comments today that I want to pick up on here.

Finances are definitely a major area for me to work on. I have a hard time trusting God with mine, not because my head doesn’t think God wants to bless me, but because my heart knows that God ultimately would like me to trust only in him. In the Garden, Adam and Eve had anything and everything they needed. They were in Paradise living a perfect life. What was it that made them want to give all of that up?

Greg hit it right on the head in his post. It was the whole area of contentment. The line of thinking goes something like: “Maybe I’m missing out on something. Maybe this fragile dependent relationship with God isn’t what I want. I want to be free to make my own choices, run my own life, and go my own way.”

Interestingly enough, in the end, Adam and Eve already had the knowledge of good and evil before they sinned. God had told them what was good and what was not. But instead, they chose to get with their own efforts what they already had for free. So instead of resting, they worked. Instead trusting, they forged on without God.

This, folks, is the nature of sin.

And restoration, sanctification, and maturity all depend on me learning how to rest, trust, and let go of my own efforts.

I just wish it wasn’t so dang hard to do.

PURRFEKT

Now that I’ve finished my summer course in Theology, and I’m beginning my fall spiritual formation class, it’s time to get back to making some entries here.

My learning contract for my class this fall is about my tendency towards perfectionism. I sure hope I do it right ;)

Seriously though, here are some questions I’d love your feedback on:

1) How has perfectionism served you?
2) What are the negative consequences you experience in your life by trying to be perfect?
3) What have you changed in this area that’s working better for you?
4) What’s the core belief of a perfectionist, especially as it relates to their relationship with God?

My goal is to become a man of simplicity, who accepts his strengths and weaknesses, and embraces his shadow of perfectionism.